I am having a lot of fun with this blogging stuff. Does the new-ness wear off and it become more than a chore? It feels a lot like journaling to me, and I used to LOVE doing that. I am not entirely sure why I ever stopped, because the last few weeks I have been back to writing, and I am enjoying it immensely.
I am thinking a lot this morning about callings, and why I seem to be struggling to find mine, while others seem to just KNOW what they are called to do. The Lord has spoken some general things about what I'll DO: I am a visionary and strategist, a foundation builder, and teacher. There are even a lot of things that the Lord has revealed about who He has created me to BE: wise, compassionate, and sincere to name a few. But, when I honestly think about looking outside of myself at who I am called TO, I just don't know. I sometimes feel like I ministry hop, trying to find what I am passionate about, and I don't always know.
Tiffani and I were talking while she was in town for the Jesus Ministry Conference and I was talking to her about this issue, and she had some sage advice. She said that sometimes we are called to a thing (teaching, or preaching for example). And, while you aren't called to teach to things, but to people, you sometimes just focus on what you love to do and the Lord will direct you from there. It was and still is an interesting thought. Especially as teaching is one of my loves. It sometimes feels at church, though, as the emphasis is finding the exact group of people you are called to: the homeless, drug addicts, troubled youth, junior highers. And, I have to say, I don't know that I can pinpoint an exact group of people I would be able to say: I am passionate about THEM. I CAN say, that I am passionate about teaching people, anyone who will listen. I love talking about the Lord, who He is, what He does and can do etc. So, how do I look for oportunities to teach within the confines of ministries that are geared towards something different? Do I sign up for the junior high ministry KNOWING that I am not sure I am 100% called to that group? Will the Lord give me a heart for them?
I sometimes wonder if this is just selfishness on my part. Am I so self-focused that I can't find it within my heart to love other people? Is that what is blocking me from moving fully into what the Lord has for me?
Just my thoughts for the morning! By the way, it is glorious here this morning! Mt. Rainier is "out," it is about 75, sunny and just perfect. Have a glorious day yourselves!