Monday, December 06, 2010

Adventures in Dating

I have decided that the world of online dating needs its own vocabulary to describe some of the folks one runs across.  These are written as "guys" but probably apply to women too...I just don't have any experience in that arena!  With no futher ado, here's my proposed list of new vocab words:

1.  The creeper.  The guy who sends you an email when you clearly have nothing in common and all he says is "You are a goddess.  You are in my dreams from now on."  And this is supposed to attract me?  Ewwww...  There are lots of these online and wading through the creepers to get to the genuine ones is what makes online dating so tiring.

2.  The professor. The guy who sends you an email picking apart your profile and pointing out all of the grammar mistakes or "awkwardly worded" phrases.  And then he wants to get to know you better.

3.  The ghost.  The guy who has no profile picture and can't seem to a. understand why you'd like to see one and b. keeps writing you, even after you've told him you only respond to people with pictures.

4.  The spammer.  The guy who "winks" at you, but due to your account settings, you can tell he's not actually read your profile.  These guys, I have found out, send out winks to many many women at a time, hoping to get a response.

5.  The Houdini. The guy you have lots of stuff in common with and everything is progressing nicely, and yet when it comes time to actually meet....he disappears.

6.  The slowpoke.  This is the guy who takes for-e-ver to respond to emails or communication.  Just when you've given up, he appears again.

7.  The fudger.  This is the guy who's profile looks great...everything seems to line up, yet when you ask key questions (like "What are your feelings on pre-marital sex?"), or when you meet with him his true colors show ("I believe sex is a normal part of a dating relationship" and he swears like a sailor while talking about drinking and getting fired from all his jobs). 

There might be more.....these are just a few from my more recent dating experiences.


1 comment:

  1. Wow! Sounds like you're meeting all the guys I dated!! :) lol! At least you're getting spared the waste of time and being able to sort through them online....although I am sorry there are so many of them wasting your time while you're just looking for Mr. Right. Just one. Not hoards of them, just one. Been praying for you! :)